I Hurt Myself Today (NIN, Hammerstein Ballroom)

If you were unable to score tickets to any of these smaller venue Nine Inch Nails shows – you couldn’t get through to Ticketmaster during the 1.5 minutes tix were on sale, you lost out on an eBay auction, you scoffed at craigslist prices (No offense, but $400?  I had a friend who paid $400 for a car.*), let me start out like this:

Monday night’s sold out Nine Inch Nails show lasted a total of ninety minutes.  There was no encore.  2000’s Fragile tour had the air of a career summation, showcasing a wide variety of material mined from the impressive catalog Trent Reznor had developed over his (then) decade-long tenure as the reigning god of industrial music.  This show felt more like a hits package, eschewing Reznor’s more subtle works to concentrate on crowd-pleasing, aggressive, faithfully recreated numbers.  The stage set up was minimal, unlike the Fragile tour’s impressively coordinated light and video package; with an emphasis on backlighting, the Hammerstein stage featured smoke and spotlights and some LED-type vertical banks that either pulsed solid colors or blipped bars that resembled sound monitors.  Unspectacular.  The band got in, got through, got out, all quickquickquick.

Given the uncreative set design and choice of numbers, and considering the $45 ticket price (before service charges) and $30 T-shirts, one could certainly argue that Reznor was making his run at filthy lucre.  In a recent column for Vice Magazine, the musician admits he was “re-energized” when he discovered his manager had absconded with all his money.  So that’s what it takes to get Trent to put down the Xbox controller.  These smaller shows – NIN’s last tour took them through arenas, easily selling out venues like Madison Square Garden – all sold out within minutes; Reznor explained on his site that he was “pleasantly surprised” by the response given the band’s long absence from the scene, and that a subsequent set of  larger-venue dates was inevitable.  So this is just a pricey run-up towards what promises to be a better-rehearsed, better-prepared major tour.

Okay, now go off and be happy thinking you didn’t miss a thing.  Because now I renounce all objectivity and say:  That was totally fucking awesome.  It was just about everything I wanted in a show.  I am so very, very happy.

And sore.

That Madison Square Garden show five years ago was, well, nice.  It was all very planned, very complete... and a little antiseptic.  They did a good job capturing that tour on And All That Could Have Been... which means it made for a good concert film.  Sure, it was cool when Marilyn Manson came out, cool that they played “Beautiful People” and “Starfuckers” together (though the performances were substandard – just check them out on the DVD).  But having floor seats at MSG means standing on a folding chair and watching the video screens a lot.

This one was about immediacy, and while it might sound silly talking intimacy in a 3500-person house with a security gap between the crowd and stage, this is about as close as I’m likely to get to the man as he sings “Closer.”  I was about half-way back on the floor for openers The Dresden Dolls, but as Reznor and Co. took the stage to “Pinion,” I got sucked up front.  I overshot the area I thought the mosh pit would be and, by the time they launched into “You Know What You Are?” what I was, was:  crushed up front, about five-six rows back from the security guys.  Close enough to see Reznor pretty clearly without my glasses, which is good as I’d stashed my glasses away, anticipating ultraviolence.

As “Sin” moved into “March of the Pigs” it became clear that there was no room to mosh.  Everybody was crushed so tightly together that it should have been claustrophobic and unbearable and stifling – and certainly, there were the usual stunned evacuees – but instead the crowd became one huge, gestalt thing.  The entire front part of the Hammerstein floor resembled a trust exercise, and no one fell.  Someone lost a shoe in the sway, but for the most part it was less a mad bum rush than a self-governing tide.

We were so tightly packed together that, I swear, at times groups would jump together and not touch the ground for long stretches.  It was like walking on the moon.

This was the immediacy I was looking for.  It wasn’t about me bonding with the music – I’ve bonded with this music already, it’s been the soundtrack to too much of my life.  It was the creation of this huge organism, born of sweat and sound and frustration and self-hatred and triumph.  “Wish” is the greatest Nine Inch Nails song ever – no arguments, kids – but in a sort of Aristotelian way (be kind, I haven’t read Greek philosophy since I was a freshman in college) it’s not really “Wish” unless, while it’s being performed, you’re wailing along and stomping your feet and hurling yourself into folks who are hurling themselves into you.  The same way a chair isn’t really a chair unless you’re sitting in it.  It’s about actualization.  And now that I’ve levitated to “March of the Pigs” and slamdanced to “Wish,” the universe is a little more real.

At least my to-do list is that much shorter.

So yes, the set-list was pretty standard (the only real surprise was “Burn,” from the Natural Born Killers soundtrack, and it was rather spare and weak), but a lot of the old warhorses roared along just fine.  “Terrible Lie” was amazing, and though I’d happily forego hearing “Head Like a Hole” again it really had a lot of life in it, tonight.  “Gave Up” was amazing, and the crowd really took to “The Hand That Feeds” (that guitar riff is simple, and fantastic).  Material from The Fragile didn’t start creeping in until halfway through the show, but I just love screaming along with “The Wretched,” and “The Day the World Went Away” na-na-na’d a nice respite into the set.  “With Teeth” should have killed – after that quiet middle section, the song should just fucking explode – but didn’t. 

(You do have to wonder when a crowd of predominantly young males, squeezed tightly front-to-back, howls “I want to fuck you like an animal!” in unison.  Y’know, I’d wager that a good many of ‘em would renounce their sexuality and suck Reznor’s cock if he told them to.  Me?  I’m not so sure I’d go that far... but were he to pass around some Kool-Aid, I’d down it no questions asked.)

And yes, it was short, and the lack of an encore is rude and dismissive (Reznor didn’t acknowledge the crowd once throughout the show).  But you know what?  I heard just about everything I wanted to hear – strangely enough, the only thing I missed was the best song on the new CD, “Only”... and I’m not sure I could have taken much more. 

The floor opened up, after a while, and there were moments when there was enough room to dance, or mosh, or stand still.  I was happy enough to start a mini pit when Reznor finally got to “Wish,” and happy that I could still bounce while exhausted young'ns looked on.  But.   I.  Am.  Old.

It used to be that before a show I’d drop a tab, or smoke a joint, or load up on as much alcohol as possible before being locked in with $5 beers.  Tonight, before the show, I popped a couple Advil.

I left euphoric, ecstatic, alive... but aching.  My neck’s already stiffened, my knees barely made it up the subway steps and my calves are cramping as I type this (My fingers are, apparently, fine.).  This wasn’t a violent show:  I only got elbowed in the face once, and kicked in the head twice, but I will hurt tomorrow.  Reznor is forty, six years older – and in much, much better shape – than I.  And I’m willing to make him this bargain:  As long as he keeps going, I will keep coming.

I’ll be the guy in the mosh pit with the walker.  Just watch out for my artificial hip, sonny.

*It was a piece of shit car, of course, and he wound up abandoning it after he’d racked up more than $400 in parking tickets.  But still...

I’m sure that a real set list will pop up somewhere, but here’s what I remember, completely out of order:

From Pretty Hate Machine:  sin, terrible lie, head like a hole

From Broken:  pinion (entrance music), gave up, suck, wish

From Downward Spiral:  closer, march of the pigs, piggy, hurt

From the Natural Born Killers Soundtrack:  burn

From The Fragile:  the day the whole world went away, no, you don’t, the wretched, even deeper

From With Teeth:  the hand that feeds, with teeth, the line begins to blur, you know what you are?

MORNING AFTER:  Okay, here’s the full set list, from the echoing the sound bulletin board:

1. Pinion
2. You Know What You Are?
3. Sin
4. March of the Pigs
5. The Line Begins to Blur
6. Piggy
7. Terrible Lie
8. Burn
9. Closer
10. The Big Come Down
11. With Teeth
12. The Day The Whole World Went Away
13. Even Deeper
14. No, You Don't
15. Suck
16. Gave Up
17. Hurt
18. The Hand That Feeds
19. Wish
20. Head Like a Hole

I can’t believe they plowed through nineteen songs (“Pinion” doesn’t count).  Maybe refusing to close the show, wait, and come back for a reprise – “Hurt” is clearly a show closer, and “Head Like a Hole” is always in the encore – is just a way to keep the momentum going.  But David Bowie was in the house, last night, and “I’m Afraid of Americans” would have made a very sweet addition to the show.

For more views on – and pictures of – last night’s show, check out Aziz, Brooklyn Vegan, Central Village, Daily Refill, One Louder, and probably 3495 other blogs...

My take on With Teeth is here.

tags: with teeth  nine inch nails  music  trent reznor  concert reviews  

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